Secrets, Lies, & Cotton Candy

Originally Written:  6/29/10 

You were like cotton candy - full of fluff, but lacking any real substance.  Or was I the cotton candy?  Melting in the presence of your seemingly sweet words, but eventually, inevitably, falling into the big, empty, black hole that was you...

How did I dissolve so easily?  Why did I melt inside your mouth - the place where smoke and secrets lingered?  Why did I want to be in a place that was so dark, empty, and broken? 

I'll tell you why.  I was lost then.  I was looking for some sort of protection - any sort of protection.  I thought I had found it - my own kind of promise land.

Little did I know...those promises were just cheap little lies.  You formed them in your secret filled head, and then they rolled right off of your lying tongue.

But you are no more than cotton candy.  No more than a sweet exterior that lacks any actual substance. 

I won't

melt for

 you.

Photos courtesy of: http://www.photobucket.com/, http://www.msn.com/, and the first one at the top is one I took myself on my cell phone camera and edited. :)

Truth Is...

Ain't that the truth.  Some of you may have been reading my blog for a few weeks, months.  A select few of you may even have been reading it for years.  So, I bid you the question:  Do you feel that you know me because you have read a few things about me, shared a few pictures with you? 

The answer is no.  You do not know me (unless you have met me in real life of course).  Don't get me wrong - there are many of you I would LOVE to meet, LOVE to be friends with.  I sincerely like some of the people whose blogs I have read, and people who have commented on my blog throughout the years.  With that said, it does not mean I know you. 

I know the people who I have shared secrets with, ridden in the passenger seat by, went to see a movie with.  I know the people who have sucked up to me, put me down, and made me feel inferior.  I know the people who I have been in pictures with, the people who have given me hugs, the people who have annoyed the crap out of me.  I do not, however, know you.  It may be a sad fact, but it's true.

I can think I know you, and you can think you know me, but that fact of the matter is we really do not know each other.  For all you know, I could be a 56 year old man from Antarctica in a civil union with a man who hates beavers.  Granted, I am not.  I do not even know if Antarctica allows civil unions, but the thing is you only know little snippets about me that I have told you.  You know nothing more, nothing less.  Think about this as your are enjoying the internet and social networking.  Though it is fun and a way to make friends, you need to see people, places, things, and ideas for what they really are.

Always in the Way?

I found the picture below while surfing the web, and I found it very moving.  It is, indeed, a PostSecret.

I don't know how many of you have heard of "PostSecret," so I will just explain it to you now in case you do not know about this amazing project.  According to http://www.postsecret.com/, "PostSecret is an ongoing community art project where people mail in their secrets anonymously on one side of a postcard."  They then publish books with these anonymous secrets in them.  Actually, I have two of them, and they are very interesting to read.  It personally makes me feel less alone because we all have secrets.  We all have something about us that we have kept hidden from everyone else.

As I mentioned earlier, I found the PostSecret pictured above incredibly moving.  I believe it deserves to be recognized and discussed.  I think it is a secret almost all of us can relate to whether we will admit it or not.  I know I, for one, have felt ugly before.  I have felt like I was in the way.  I have felt that something would have been better of without me.  How about you?  Have you ever felt this way?

Secrets.

Secrets...
Do they make friends or lose them?
Save self-esteems or bruise them?
Put the innocent into captivity...
or allow prisoners to run free?
What would we be without them?
Absolutely nothing.
Do you agree or disagree?
Secrets.