Thursday, December 25, 2008

Merry Christmas; Jesus is the Reason!!!

Hi! Sorry for not posting as much as usual this month; I've just been really busy. I plan to post a new blog pretty soon though...I just wanted to wish you all a Merry Christmas!!!!!!! And remember: Jesus is the reason for the season!!!!!! It's all because of him. <3

Thursday, December 18, 2008

The Magical Spirit of Christmas.

Christmas is a time of giving to others. It is a time for family, friends, and other loved ones. It is a time to thank God. Christmas means many things to many different people.

I realize that not everyone out there celebrates Christmas, but I do not know what I would do without it. Christmas has always been such a special time for me, and it isn't just about the presents. What I love about Christmas is the just seems magical. Simply opening a door for someone might make their day. You never know what will make someones day. I have learned this through the many little moments that have made a number of my days special.

It is not that we never do anything nice for anyone else other times. It's just that in the Christmas season it is more recognizable, more tangible...

When many people think back on their Christmas memories, they remember the warmth surrounding them despite the freezing weather. This is what I wish everyone would be able to feel all year around...

To all who read this, I would like to wish you and yours a great Christmas and happy holidays. Most importantly, try to keep your focus on what is really important.

Monday, December 15, 2008

It Scares Me That I'm Losing My Mind...

I have not written in awhile because I can't think of anything to write. I am losing it, my touch, my inspiration. When will it come back? It scares me that I haven't had anything to say in so long. Why are my creative juices not flowing?! I am sure they are somewhere deep inside of me, but how deep are they buried in the back of my mind. When will they resurface? I WANT THEM BACK!!!!! Writing for others to read is my passion, my love, my why am I having so much trouble thinking? Thinking used to be so simple for me! What is going on with me? I am losing my mind, and it scares me...

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Thank You To Write Love on Her Arms.

I just finished an amazing story by a girl named Renee Yohe. She is the person who inspired the movement known as "To Write Love on Her Arms," and she has gone through so much more than most of us will ever have to go through. You think you have a lot of problems, well you read this book and then ask yourself that question again.
The book is called Purpose for the Pain, and of course I am in love with that title. I believe that there is a reason for everything, and even if something may seem like a misfortune now it could just be a blessing in disguise. I am not even sure how to describe this book in a way that will capture the emotion in this girl's story.
Most of the words in Purpose for the Pain were actually hand written journal entries by Renee herself. She has such a poetic way of describing things, and it makes you feel very sorry for her, but then you also feel so full of hope at the same time. You know that it will end up okay because she is still here today to talk about her experiences. She also thanks God for her blessings, and clearly states that her recovery and healing was all because of Him.
If you did not already know, hope is a very meaningful word to me. There was a time in my life when I do not know what I would have done without hope. There are still times in my life I do not know what else to do but hope. Hope is a foundation for so many people. There are people surviving, depending, relying on hope. We need to help give everyone hope. No matter how cheesy this sounds, we all need to pull together and save some lives.
To Write Love on Her Arms is an organization that gives so many people hope. I am sure it has saved many lives by just existing. It shows us that there is a point to our lives, and that we are not just living for ourselves. It is part of God's plan or else it would not be here. You are part of God's plan too, and that I think is one of the main reasons Purpose for the Pain was written. It was written to save lives. So please join me in supporting To Write Love on Her Arms. Go to the website and read the story of how it all started, and then read Purpose for the Pain, and know that there truly is a purpose for the pain.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

I Don't Forget...

"When you make a mistake, don't look back at it long. Take the reason of the thing into your mind and then look forward. Mistakes are lessons of wisdom. The past cannot be changed. The future is yet in your power." -Hugh White.

Mistakes are wisdom. Wisdom is knowledge. The past has already been written, but the future is a new notebook. Stop reading your old journal entries and write new ones.

That is what I am supposed to say, but is it really that easy? Maybe I am just a hypocrite, because I am the one who can't forget about the past.

I love my present, and look forward eagerly to my future, but one thing I don't do is forget...

Saturday, November 15, 2008

The Feeling.

She stares out the window, and watches the rain fall. She sees her reflection staring right back at her. Then she begins to think of the many people who have come into her life, and the ones who have left. She thinks of the many good friends she has obtained over the years. Her expression is solemn while she draws a smiley-face in the condensation on the window. She is in a state of contentment, and she quite likes it there. The friends that have entered her life have come in for a purpose, as well as the ones who left. She knows this, and experiences a moment of enlightenment. It is like everything in her life suddenly makes sense in a way that she cannot put into words. That is because it is not about the words; it's about the feeling.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Lacking Inspiration.

Look, I know I need to write; I have not written on here as consistently as I normally do. However, I have been quite busy lately, and I have also been lacking inspiration. Hey, it happens to all of us at one time or another. Haha. Anyway, since I don't want to post anything new, I thought I'd at least post something old; I wrote this poem freshman year. So, here it is:

Stars glimmer while animals skitter.
Shadows loom around.
People hang out lazily.

The cat senses something.
Winds pick up momentum.
Sprinkles begin outside
Adults warn relatives.

Then thunder booms suddenly.
Lightning makes children and animals hide.
Mama shouts "Flash Flood!"
Daddy swears unmentionable words.

Finally the storm ends.
Animals and children crawl out of cellars.
Adults call relieved relatives.
People clean up their yards.

Saturday, November 1, 2008

It's Falling Into Place.

You know how people say that finally that their life is falling into place? Well, I think my life might be going through that process right now. Sure, things change, there is still drama, problems, and everyday difficulties. Yes, friends grow apart and disappoint you, and you learn that you can't always make everyone happy.
I just feel more whole this year than I've felt in a really long time. Even though there are still problems and everyday anxieties, it seems like I am dealing with them better.
I am definitely not perfect, but I feel that I am becoming a better person. I have friends that are making me a better person. I have more control over my life than I have had in a really long time, if not ever. For so long I allowed others to have control of my life, and finally I am getting the backbone to be able to take some control of my own life. I may not have taken total control yet, but I at least feel that I have more than I did in the past.
There are many people who have helped me, and continue to help me through my life journey, but I think a big reason why my life fell into place was me. My attitude changed, my insecurities lessened, and I changed. I am not the same girl I was when I started my freshman year, or even at the end of my sophomore year.
So just know that if you're having problems right now that they will end. If right now isn't the greatest time in your life, then wait. Look forward to your future, and try to love every moment you have in your life! Appreciate not only the big things, but also the little quirks of life. Allow people to help you, and allow everything to fall into place.
"When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life that you have a thousand reasons to smile. "

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Our Differences Are Breaking Us Apart.

Why must there be so many arguments over politics? We all say we are working for peace, but we are just having more and more fights. I know politics are an essential part of our society, but they are breaking us apart. I do not believe friendships should be broken over politics, but they are all the time.

Look at all of the derogatory campaign adds with the elections going on. Some of the commercials are just plain mean. As I mentioned earlier, we are working towards peace. However, if we are truly trying then why does the campaigning become so darn mean? I know that people have strong feelings against certain candidates, but that is no reason for violence or broken friendships.

I have noticed lately the very diverse views people have on politics, and it has made me think. I think it is great that we are all allowed to have our varying views on things like the election; it's America for crying out loud! I just do not think that politics should make us hate or dislike anyone. I do not think that just because someone has different views than someone else that violence or cruelty should be the last resort.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

If One Door Closes...

I am sure the majority of you have heard at least one or two sayings very similar to these: "God never shuts one door without opening another," or "When one door closes another door opens." I think sayings like these are uplifting and comforting.
During a rough time I can look at these words, listen to them, or hear them, and there is some amount of comfort that accompanies them. Maybe words don't fix all of your problems, but they can definitely be a start.
One of my favorite words in the whole English language is "hope." It is a simple, four-letter word, but it means so much to me. It has played a big part in my life. I may be young, but I know that hope is one of the things that has given me the strength to survive. Of course, I know all blessings have come from God; I'm not trying to disrespect that aspect. I am just so grateful for the strength to hope that God has provided me with.
I am not trying to make my life sound like a sad, sob story. My life has been amazing compared to many others in the world, but we all have our rough patches and times that we need hope. We need that extra boost of strength to relieve us. I've had my times and you've probably had yours.
Luckily, during these times, we have words that can comfort us, "God never shuts one door without opening another." If hearing those words in a time of need, wouldn't you just want to inhale a breath of fresh air and thank God for life?!
However, if for some reason all the doors are closed, a song called "My Wish" by the band Rascal Flatts tells us what to do. "And if one door opens to another door closed, I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window..." That is one of my most favorite parts of the song, if not my favorite. The whole song is inspiring and uplifting, and also has a very good message with a lot of truth behind it.
Just remember on those seemingly hopeless days that if one door closes another is bound to open. Maybe it won't be today, or tomorrow, or even this year that a miraculous change will occur. It could take years for you to realize what good you have gained from a horrible experience.
As I have said many times, and many have said before me, everything happens for a reason. There is some greater purpose for the trials and tribulations we go through at any given time. We always have God and we should always have hope because, "God never shuts one door without opening another."

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

The Explanation That You Have Been Waiting For...

My good friend asked me a very thought-provoking question recently, and in an attempt to answer him I will write this scientific article. I have spent many hours researching this topic, and I finally came to some conclusions. I am sure you will all be glad to know the answer to the very controversial question: "How do they get the cream in the Twinkie?"

Maybe you have wondered this yourself, or maybe I just inspired you by getting you to think about something that you had never questioned before. Either way, I hope what I present is helpful so you question Twinkies no more!

First of all, you have to understand that this information must be kept as confidential as possible. I trust you reading this to keep it within the scientific community. If the answer got out, the Twinkie population would be destroyed as we know it! Out of respect to me and your fellow Twinkiemen, please abide by this one rule.

The answer is very simple: it is all through the hard work of the Twinkie Fairies. They spend every day, and many long nights, concocting the perfect Twinkie filling. It has to be the perfect texture, the perfect taste, the perfect scent, and the perfect everything. (The fairies are very picky when it comes to making the absolutely perfect creation!)

They then march their little fairy butts right into the Twinkie, determined to complete the job. Gently, with their tiny hands, they distribute the delicate cream throughout the Twinkie.

When the hard-working Twinkie Fairies get done with one Twinkie, they immediately start to work on the next the first Twinkie will have a twin! When a Twinkie is finished, the fairies take a satisfied step back to admire the result of their hard work for a few moments. Finally, the Twinkie is wrapped up and placed in a Hostess box with other pairs of Twinkies, never to be seen by the Twinkie Fairies again.

You see, this question I just explained to you in detail was not a very difficult question to answer. It is very easy to understand once you do some research or have it explained to you! I hope that the chosen few able to read this secret, scientific, article now need not question anymore how the creamy filling gets in the Twinkie!

-Over & Out until next time: Dr. Molly XYZ

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Perfection is a Facade.

Have you ever thought somebody was that perfect person? Maybe you thought there was just something special about your friend, significant other, classmate or co-worker, or someone that you just admired and looked up to...but, we all know that no one is perfect. If you do not realize that by now, you definitely need to wake up and digest a bite of the real world.
There is nobody, anywhere out there, that is pure perfection with the exception of God.
However, it can be really easy to get caught up in someone and believe in the facade that this certain someone portrays. This person might not mean to seem perfect, but in spite of that, they still come off as perfect.
Deep down you know they are not. It is just common sense that nobody is perfect. Nevertheless, sometimes you unintentionally place someone up on a pedestal without even realizing it. I think most all of us do that to a certain extent; it's just human nature, except in some situations, it can go too far.
We place someone up so high in our minds, and then their imperfections start to show. At that point, we realize that they are merely human and it has the potential to be simply heartbreaking.
That is why sometimes we need to stop it before it goes too far. We need it to dawn on us, early on, that despite all of the great qualities someone might have, they are definitely not perfect. They have faults, difficulties, mistakes, and struggles just like the rest of us. When you finally take the time to think about this and take it all in, it could end up being such a relief.
At last, when you begin to see that nobody can possibly be perfect, you can take a deep breath and maybe, just maybe, be happy with yourself and with the people around you.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

The Title of This is Quite Long in Proportion to the Actual Paragraph.

Why is it that sometimes silence can be so unbearably loud?

Why can someone feel totally alone in a crowd full of people?

Unfortunately, I've been there.

Actually, in the end it was quite fortunate because it made me who I am. Now I am able to have an optimistic outlook and see that.

Most of us go ask questions to ourselves on a regular basis. Perhaps you question yourself multiple times a day.

Maybe it isn't all about the questions though; maybe it's more about the answers.

However, sometimes we must just trust ourselves enough to not second guess everything just live and see what happens.

Saturday, October 4, 2008

The Inspiration: Hypothetical Coffee.

As some of my friends know, I used to blog on myspace. I used to publish my creative articles there before I made this blog. Well, I just thought people might like to read the myspace post that actually inspired the name of my blog, "Hope, Fate, and and a Little Hypothetical Coffee..." It was something I wrote at a time when so many things felt like they were changing. It was called, "Maybe it’s time to wake up and smell the hypothetical coffee. " So without any further hoopla, please enjoy!

Maybe it’s time to wake up and smell the hypothetical coffee.

It is March 2, 2008. I am sitting here. Thinking. Like always...
Obviously I'm a thinker...I'm pretty insightful at times. However lately it seems like I've been having more trouble with understanding situations. It's not just one or two; it's a multiple kind of thing.

There are so many changes going on right now, and natural instincts of course tell me to hold on. Holding on isn't always an option. Holding on isn't always the way to go. Holding on sometimes is just plain old, plain old not available whatsoever. I need to wake up, smell the coffee and realize this. It isn't just me though; numerous people need to wake up and smell the hypothetical coffee of life. Call me deep. Call me absurd. Call me absolutely insane. The main point of it is still true.

Opportunities are not taken so often. How many people have told you this? Well, maybe it's time to listen to them. Maybe it's time to forgive and forget. Or maybe it's time to apologize. Maybe it's time to open up to someone. Maybe it's time for time. Maybe it's time to simply relax, and live. Life is something that can either be a wasted opportunity or a miraculous experience that will mean so much. Realize what you need to do at this taken for granted time like so many people don't.
Do it before the chance escapes you...

Friday, September 26, 2008

Unsettling Memories; The Strength in Remembering.

She feels a sense of pride when people say that she is the happiest person they have ever met, or when they simply say she seems happy all the time.

It is true now, but there was a time when it wasn't.

There was a time when no matter how happy she was on the outside, her insides were crying as if there were no tomorrow.

She takes a deep breath and steadies herself; it isn't like that anymore. She's not even the same person that she once was! Still, there are times when her mind subconsciously decides to wander back to that time of angst and sorrow. It was a difficult time in her life, and it is definitely a hard time to revisit through her thoughts and memories.

However, it would be even worse if she did not revisit it. She does not want to forget those memories no matter how unsettling they may be. She knows that in the end, it was all worth it. If she had not been through so many painful days and nights, she would not be the same person she is now. She would be totally different and not nearly as strong. She now knows what true strength is, and it makes her smile both on the inside and out.

She smells the familiar scent of the air around her, and she knows she is where she is meant to be.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Getting Our Priorities Straight.

Why are we so concerned about petty things that aren't important, yet when something is important, we take it for granted?

Why do we even care if Britney Spears shaves her head or if Lindsay Lohan is a lesbian? Let's face it: that will most likely not matter in the long run of our lives.

However, many of the things we do have, we take for granted. Whether we are always used to having our cell phone by our side, or always having that one friend that is there for us no matter what, there are things we all take for granted.

Either way, we need to understand that cell phone could break, or the friend we've always counted on could get tired of being just a doormat.

Of course we will always take something for granted; it's human nature.

We just have to understand that no matter how hard a time we are going through, there is almost always a person worse off. Stay optimistic, and keep your head up through the rough patches.

This may be easier said than done, but it is possible to keep your head up even when everything else seems down.

There are times in life when we must take a step back and look at our priorities for what they are.

Some time you might realize that what is close to the bottom, should be near the top...

And some things are not as important as they once seemed.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

And Yet...

It is sometimes difficult to grasp when you try so hard, and yet...

That is the problem right there: the "and yet..." And yet you aren't good enough, old enough, pretty or handsome enough, tall enough, smart enough. There are so many times when someone might claim that you are not enough. It isn't right in many cases, but it happens.

Okay, so maybe your two year old sister is not big enough to ride The Torturer at the local theme park; that's understandable. However, when someone makes you feel inferior or takes you for granted, it is a much different situation.

It's just you cannot change the other group of people by force. It would be nice sometimes if it were that easy, but life isn't easy.

You can't change the past, as many people before me have said. You can change how you are in your present and future; so much of it depends on your attitude. That statement does not necessarily mean if you think positively everything will be great all the time. Everything is definitely not great all the time. That's just the way it goes.

However, it sure can make your life a heck of a lot better! As the late and great Randy Pausch said, "We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play play the game."

Saturday, September 6, 2008

Is Ignorance Always Bliss?

Certain people are just so ignorant sometimes. They are full of themselves, yet insecure. You can hear them lament from miles away out of their own self pity.

However this is not always obvious to everyone. Sometimes it takes a long time to figure out whether a person is real or fake. So many people are not real today because they strive to be like a Barbie doll or maybe it is just their personality.

There are also people who try to be genuinely real most of the time, but we all mess up sometimes. Obviously we are not all perfect, and that is okay. It is just that some people get to the point of being fake, that you don't know what to think is the truth anymore. You do not know if what they do or say is the truth or just another lie.

It gets to me when someone begs and begs for something that they don't even care enough to give in return, to a person who has also begged and begged to them. That might not make sense to everyone, but it has a good point and it makes a darn lot of sense to me.

I wish people would not be so thoughtless to ask for something that they will not give back. I am not saying if you give someone a Christmas present they should give you one. I am not even speaking in terms of material things. I am saying that if you ask for kindness from someone else you should probably be kind in return.

I think this applies for many attributes like kindness and trust. Of course there are mistakes or problems or disagreements every once in awhile, but I feel that if all of the participants in the relationship are willing, then some kind of peaceful decision can be made.

Maybe we are not able to see all people for who they really are all the time. However, sometimes we need to take the responsibility for opening our own eyes...

Sunday, August 31, 2008

Just the Girl Next Door...Or Is She?

She sighs, and realizes yet again that all she feels like is the "Girl Next Door." She knows she is capable of much more. She longs to be much more, but she is confused and unsure. Her heart is not broken, but it is cracked. Why does it seem like everybody she thought she knew is not who they once were?

She needs a constant, something concrete, something to hold on to. Very well she knows that she cannot hold on forever. She has been told that so many times that she could not even hazard a guess at how many times it has been repeated to her.

Once again she feels like she does not know anything. She tries so hard, harder than most, yet she is still the one that just doesn't know. It feels like most of the others know, even though she knows that is not true.

Her life is so confusing to her; she just doesn't understand. All she really needs is for someone to take her hand. She writes "I love you" carefully in the sand, and then watches it wash away, and loses her command.

After all the struggling, all the questioning, all the praying, she is still unsure of what exactly it is that she has. She knows she could be more, but understands that it will take time. She also knows, even if it does not feel like it sometimes, that there are constants in her life.

Most of all, she realizes that she is strong. She always has been strong, and always will be. There are times when she feels weak, but compared to most she has a great amount of strength. She silently admits that this will make her last a while longer...

Friday, August 22, 2008

White Crayons.

I have just been thinking about a little quote I found; one you might find on a computer graphic or a hokey T-shirt. It seems random and silly at first, but being me I found a special meaning behind it.

The quote goes like this: "I don't understand white crayons. Why are they here? What do they want from us?"

The first time I saw this quote I thought it was cute and witty, but did not know when I looked deeper into it that it would seem philosophical to me.

White crayons can represent all of those annoying people or stressful situations in our lives. We don't always know why we have to put up with "that one person" or deal with a seemingly horrible situation.

However, there are always reasons for these people or situations. Maybe we will see that in the near future. Maybe we will not see it for many years. Maybe we will never understand at all why things go the way that they go.

No matter what we may or may not see though, there is still a point.

White crayons might not show up on white paper, but as long as you have a piece of black paper white crayons will show up just fine!

There are certain people and situations that might not be necessary for you, but might be the best thing for someone else. Maybe someone is not right for you, but is perfect for another person. Or perhaps they are just an old, broken crayon that just needs to be thrown away all together!

Either way, as I continue to firmly believe, there is a reason for everything.
After all...even white crayons are useful for something. :)

Thursday, August 14, 2008

She is great, but she wants to be greater.

She stares at the clock ticking and tocking. She wishes that she could totally take off her uncomfortable mask and not worry so much about what others think. She has let a select few people inside her soul. She longs to let in more but she is scared, so scared.

She thinks so much of so many people and a good amount of them don't even know. Why don't they know? Why does she have to be so worried?

She is great, but she wants to be greater.

She tries to be so good, and hates when she is not able to live up to her very high expectations. She needs to know that she doesn't have to live up to those expectations. A part of her already knows, but it is the other part that is the problem.

She is in a learning stage right now; it is a part of her life when she is feeling such mixed emotions. One day she is totally ecstatic; the next day she could be depressed and self pitying.

She is not sure if she even knows what it is that she wants anymore. She thought she had it all figured it out a long time ago.

However she had not figured it out; she had not figured it out at all.

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Fate says, "Take a number."

"There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as if everything is." -Albert Einstein

I gaze into the silvery eyes of Fate. He tells me to take a number; there are many who have to go before me. I stand behind millions of people who are readying themselves to go and I take a deep breath and quietly whisper "Thank you," because it is not yet my time.

We think we need more time; sometimes it feels as if we get so little.

Is it that we don't have enough time or is it that we do not appreciate the time we are given? There are people who believe both.

I believe that it can be both in a way...

We might not have time to finish a small task for school or work, but will that matter as much in the long run as taking the time to have a serious, long-needed conversation with a good friend?

I am not going to state my opinion right now; it is not really necessary. I just think that it is something to ponder on.

Thinking about what will really matters in the long run can give us a lot of insight to our life, ourselves. It opens up a part of our soul.

Maybe all we really need sometimes is a little dusting out of the soul and finding out what matters.

Thursday, July 31, 2008

"Expect nothing and appreciate everything."

Life does not have to be fair. Nobody gets what they want all the time whether they will admit to it or not, and this is the way it should be. We have God's love which is already so incredibly much more than we deserve.

We take a massive amount of hoopla for granted this day and age. We have a world full of choices even if all we decide to do is to sit our lazy butt down in front of the computer and update our myspace or facebook profile. Admit it, this is what many of us do...including myself! I have no room to criticize the people who do this because I am one of many who do it.

We have so much we could be doing whether it is riding our bike, or actually writing a letter the "snail mail" way. However right now you're probably saying, "Who does that anymore?", right?

However we choose to text on our cell phones, post pictures online, beat medium on Guitar Hero, or download the new Taylor Swift song to our iPod. I am definitely not saying these are bad activities to do. They are not always bad. It is just after awhile we begin to expect all of this to come to us, and all of these material things become like another false god to us because we practically worship them in a way.

The point I am trying to get to is some people don't have all of these items that we take for granted. There are so many people who would be thrilled to just get a good, satisfying meal every day. They do not have a panic attack when their Internet is not working because they don't even have a home to live in let alone a computer to enjoy. We just need to learn to appreciate what we take for granted.

I definitely am not trying to sound like a hypocrite; I will willingly confess that I do take too much for granted. I just hope that someday we could learn to truly appreciate some of the simpler things that we usually do not, whether it is a friendly "Hello" or a fulfilling meal around the table with your family.

Just take the time to try and appreciate something today that you usually would not. As a quote says "Expect nothing and appreciate everything." I am not sure who wrote it or said it, or even if the quote is exactly write. The point though is that it is definitely a quote full of wisdom and truth...

Saturday, July 26, 2008

Profound Simplicity.

Isn't it weird how one day you can think you know yourself so extremely well, and the next day you are so confused about who you are and start to question everything? One day you can be extremely confident with very few insecurities, and for some reason you wake up the next day and you're just not the same. You don't quite know what it is either; it's just like an aura or a vibe. It is not something you particularly like, but you do not know how to change it.

I have some discovering to do. I am not quite sure who exactly I am anymore. I know this is a regular teenage feeling to go through, but it still is weird to actually go through it. Maybe it is just something that is meant to happen to everybody. I think in a way that every person at some point in their life goes through a process of self-discovery; it's just a natural human process to go through.

I know everyone goes through changes. Maybe it is not a big change. Maybe for years your favorite color was yellow and then you wake up one day and it's suddenly changed to hot pink. Things like that just happen sometimes.

However, maybe the change you're going through is a big change. Maybe it is something that feels so monumental. It could have happened suddenly or gradually over time, but it's not something that goes unnoticed. There are both good changes and bad changes. There are also good AND bad changes. Sometimes it takes a really long time to see the good in something bad, and then you find out that the change shouldn't have been seen as bad at all. It was a good change! It just took you awhile to figure out because sometimes that's just the way it goes. It doesn't sound like the most philosophical saying in the world, "sometimes that's just the way it goes." Sometimes though, it is about the simplicity in the statement that makes it so profound. Sometimes the simplicity is the attribute we need to focus on the most...

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Just to let you all know...

I started a new personal blog because this one's more for my creative writing, and I'd like to keep it that way. So it's in my links, check it out! :)

Monday, July 14, 2008

Letting Go...Because I Have To.

Finally the ball is in my court, and you are in the palm of my hand. I clasp my fingers around you and do not let you go. After all this time you are mine; it is not the other way around anymore. I smile a victorious smile and enjoy the moment. You stubbornly try to escape from my determined hand, but I tighten my grip. I tighten the grip that I've wanted, needed, for oh so long.

I am no longer a slave, and I feel the freedom envelope me. I smell the glory of change. The anger I have felt has alas won over my lamentation. I wipe off the last tear with the back of my hand and then wash my face literally and metaphorically.

Then I loosen the grip that I have worked so hard to obtain. I loosen the grip and set you free, because I do not want to enslave you as you enslaved me. That is not what I want at all. I just need you to go for my sake. I have to do this because it is best for me, and I finally have to do this. I have to believe I am better than that because it's true; I am. I am not being conceited; there are just times when someone deserves better, and in this case it was me.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

In Love?

I have been thinking about something that I would appreciate feedback on. Some people do it, and some don't. Some young preteens or teenagers do this though. What I am thinking of is when people (usually preteens or teenagers) are "going out" or whatever they choose to call it, and let's say after 2 days of dating they think they are "IN LOVE" with each other. Many of the couples saying this are no older than 13 or 14, maybe even younger, but after 2 freaking of days of dating they are MADLY in love with one another. I am sorry if this blog offends anyone, but most of the younger couples who do this do not even know what that kind of love feels like, let alone feel it. However they have things like, "John [loves Kaye soooo much! <3]"

Monday, July 7, 2008

Feelings & Trust.

Sometimes you just have to do what feels right. You are not always able to know whether it will be right ten years from now, but sometimes you just have to take that chance. Risks can provide you with some of the best feelings in life. They can also provide you with some of the worst feelings in life. Either way it is important to have experience with different kinds of feelings whether that feeling is ecstatic or heartbroken. Look at "the little rich girl" who seems to always get her way. She does not know how to feel compassion for a human being who is less fortunate than her.
I have definitely had my fair share of feelings. If you know me very well at all you should already know that. I have taken at least a couple of major risks, but I hope to take more in the future. Sometimes there is someone or something that you have to trust. Whether it is yourself you are trying to trust or someone else, eventually your heart just tells you that you need to have faith in something or someone. I believe that it is natural human nature to feel that way. There are times we need to just peel the layer of protection off of our hearts. We need to have faith in ourselves and others enough to be open to trust...

Wednesday, July 2, 2008


I was thinking about imperfections today. Imperfection is something everyone should be able to relate to. Everyone has their own imperfections, whether it has to do with the way we look, feel, or act. Sometimes our imperfections are not so bad at all, but it is just the way we view the so-called "imperfections" that makes them seem bad. Of course we do have some imperfections that we would like to change. I know that there have been times when I've cared about someone so much that I have smothered them. It is a fault that I am trying to work on. We all have our faults and our weaknesses. I think a positive thing we can do is to accept the imperfections we are not able to change. We can try to appreciate the quirkiness of our imperfections as a special trait that helps to define who we are. As for the imperfections we can change maybe we should change certain aspects of ourselves and maybe we should not change others. It all depends on the individual trait that we call an imperfection. Maybe when you take the time to reflect you will realize that you don't have so many imperfections after all!

*ahem* the start of my blogging on blogspot. haha :)

Hello all. Sooo obviously I've decided to start a blog. =] I've blogged on myspace also, but I just wanted to have a blogging blog instead of just myspace blog. haha. Anyway, I have started this blog to write because I love to write. I plan on using it quite a bit. That's my hope anyway. So please check out my blog frequently for exciting reads. (haha) OH and leave me comments on my blogs! I love comments! Well for now I suppose I will go. But who knows? Maybe I will even write another actual blog with some actual interesting stuff in it later today. Because obviously this blog is not very interesting! So bye for now! :)