I have trouble trying to find good enough words to describe 2010. It has been truly ASTOUNDING! Last year, I worried I was going to be infinitely single - that I was never going to find anyone who completed me. In my journal on January 1, 2010, I wrote:
“I know I started out 2009 the same way, and I sometimes hate to admit it, but I am SO TIRED of being single! I don’t know why I am so doomed to be single! Maybe 2010 will be different. Maybe I’ll find someone who loves me, and respects me, and appreciates me. This is what I hope.”
...And so I did. :) I went out and found myself the man of my dreams, and I really only had to look right in front of me. In 2010, I accomplished the one thing I wanted most. I cannot believe I found a guy who fit my description of what I looked for in a guy so perfectly. I used to be so bitter about love. I hated to look at happy couples because I was terrified that I would end up as the lady with fifty cats. However, I did not, and I am extremely grateful for that.
As for everything else in 2010...wow. I mean, I had a great senior year of high school. I believe everyone who says that senior year is the best year, because it really is. With the way my freshman year of high school started out, I had no clue that my senior year of high school would be SO much better, to the extent that it was almost unbelievable. Totally unexpectedly, I was elected prom queen. I was humbled, unbelievably, by that whole experience. I won the award for having the most school spirit. I graduated and ended the long, but essential, journey we call “high school”. I was amazed when I was offered a theatre tuition waiver to college, along with a theatre scholarship. I cannot believe I was once the freshman girl who would stare down at the floor and who liked to make believe she did not exist.
With that said, I also started a new journey. I am now a freshman in college. I fully planned on majoring in theatre at the beginning of the year. Now, honestly, I am not so sure what I want to do with my life. I never knew it would be such a hard decision. Other things have simply become more important to me than the theatre. Ryan, for example. I am not saying theatre is not at all important to me; it has been a huge part of my life for quite a few years now. I am just not sure how far along theatre and I will travel together, hand in hand.
I have definitely become a different person this year. As for lessons, I have learned many. There have been people who have disappointed me this year, but of course, that is to be expected. I saw the flaws in someone that I basically considered to be perfect. No one is perfect. Life teaches me that over and over again, every year. However, I also made many great friends this year. I never knew just how many great people I would meet in college. I was amazed at how some of the people I met were, and are, so similar to me. I have a wonderful life, and I am beginning to realize that more and more every day. This year (especially compared to last year) has been so incredibly easy. It has been a piece of cake. I have kept my emotions more in check and I have matured by leaps and bounds.
More people have pleased me than disappointed me. One great loss I suffered this year was the death of my Papaw. It was totally unexpected and hard for me to cope with at times (even though I hardly ever showed it). I did not know how much I would miss him until he was gone. While that was a major downer, I still cannot forget all of the great memories from this year.
By far, the best thing that came about this year was my relationship with Ryan. I think it shocked almost everyone who knew us when we suddenly got together. We had been talking for awhile, but not many people knew that our late night facebook conversations would soon become a full blown romantic relationship. Heck, not many people even knew we were having late night facebook conversations. However, I am glad that we did. I know most people around my age say their relationship will last, and in a lot of cases it doesn’t, but Ryan and I are different. I just know it will work out between us. I fully see us in fifty years, sitting on our couch together. I love him, and I am truly glad I have had to go through so many hardships to finally find him because now it is so good. I am glad that I waited to be with Ryan because some things are just worth waiting for. ;)
All in all, 2010 has been a blast. I look forward to creating a bunch of fun, new, memories in 2011 with Ryan and all of my friends. I cannot wait to see what this coming year has in store for me!!!!!